Don’t Give Up, Mom!

Don’t Give up all you Moms out there! This is a plea to your heart and mine. Being a mom is hard – like down in the trenches being hit by green diaper bombs hard.

The difficulty of motherhood varies year by year, day by day, and sometimes moment by moment. There are some days I feel like “I am rocking this Mom thing,” then there are other days I’m drowning in a pool, not able to catch my breath or even see above the water.

It’s a process.

Lately, I’ve been in a rough season. Different than the younger years, but still a challenge.

My oldest daughter got married two weeks ago. We are extremely happy for her, but planning a wedding brings what I’m told are typical Mother/Daughter things with planning wedding stress. Did I say stress? I mean like mental breakdown – on my part with trying to get everything done. I couldn’t have done it without my own Mom to keep me sane.

During the most stressful planning part, my 12-year-old daughter decided to get sick. Like really sick. My 12-year-old is non-verbal, not toilet trained, has pica (eats inanimate objects), and has Autism. She could not tell us what was wrong.

I know she was sick because, like most moms, you can see it in their faces and body language, along with other obvious signs. Plus, she had an up and down fever, stopped moving, and that’s a big red flag for her. After a week of tending to her, I could no longer keep her hydrated, so we went to the ER. I told them all the symptoms, and after a solid week in the hospital, they never could figure out what was wrong with her. They threw antibiotics at her, and numbers started getting better, so I could check her out of the hospital and bring her home.

At the hospital, because my daughter was so weak, she could not help me change her. I ended up hurting my back more than it already was. I have two bulged discs, and I was trying to lift a 12-year-old on my own to change her diaper and such. Let just say the hospital stay was not easy on her, my other kids, my husband, or myself.

I finally get her gut health better and her strength back after researching a bunch of natural remedies. I mean, I had nothing else to do at the time except everything. Plus, we were only 30 days until the wedding at that point.

I was the epidemy of rocking this mom thing – right?

I had missed my oldest daughter’s graduation from college, my husband missed my fourth daughter’s graduation from fifth grade (because he swapped with me for a few hours at the hospital). Plus, numerous things got put off until the following week that we were out of the hospital.

So fellow Mamas, when I say I couldn’t catch my breath for a few weeks – I literally couldn’t catch my breath. Between the pain in my back and my stress level, meetings, end of school year IEPs, wedding details, I also wasn’t sleeping.

“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”

Galatians 6:9

Can I confess to you that I was weary? I was sobbing on the floor, weary. The pain in my back and still having to change my two special needs kid’s diapers and still having to press through everything because there was no choice.

Don’t give up, Mama. That is all I could hear God saying.

Pressing through our own pain and pressing through our kids’ pain is all we can do. God is working all things out, but that doesn’t mean that it’s easy. It means “don’t give up.”

“But you, take courage! Do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded.”

2 Chronicles 15:7

I was growing weary. Thankfully verses of not giving up have been sown into my heart. I needed to catch my breath. I just felt a gentle push to keep going. God made me. He knew and allowed everything that was going on to happen. I knew and understand in these times; I need to press further into Him.

A sweet friend that knew I was being pressed like a grape through a wine press said – this verse may sting, but you need to keep this on your heart.

“More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

Romans 5:3-5

 Don’t give up, Mama.

My pain goes up and down. Prayers for healing either my children or myself have not been answered yet. My hope and faith go on.

God is who gets me through each day, which is why it’s my desire for every Mama out there to know Him. I can not fathom trying to get through this world without the hope Jesus offers.

The peace and clarity I get only come from Him. This is why I can say, “Don’t give up, Mama” I pray that every one of you knows Jesus. If you have your own stories of hope, I would love to hear them. If you don’t know Jesus and would love to take a step in that direction, please feel free to send a message.

This Mom thing is hard. Don’t do it alone.

Jenny Cioto

Pursuing true North

Rating: 5 out of 5.